Day Forty-Eight
When I was little I remember going to the park and playing on the teeter-totter, I loved it. The thrill of going up high and plummeting back down and doing it over and over again as long as possible. My life is now this way up and down all day long, every day. I can feel like I am soaring and then feel the gravity and plummet to the ground but what can I do but push off the ground fighting to get back up? This is the first day Ryan has thrown up, he felt sick yesterday but it passed... today it didn't pass. He has been feeling sick today and it looks like a deep sunburn across his forehead to his left temple, I have never seen redness like this so far, it looks painful. I keep wanting to put something on his head but I am scared too with radiation going on. I hope this passes soon. Its amazing to see how people deal with our situation, some just look at me with sad eyes and offer condolences, some avoid me like my sadness or stress is contagious, some pretend to be my friend just