Day Twelve
I woke up today feeling more optimistic. I was thinking about how great Ryan seems to be doing, his pain is getting a little less each day and he is moving around a bit more. He is feeding himself, showering himself, walking around and doing a bit better in communicating. This feeling of optimism was shattered after our call with the Oncologist. We have been working hard to get him feeling better, only to have a call remind us of how terrible this situation is, we are working to get him better to just feel terrible again. The Dr. said 'there is no cure, I know that is hard to hear but the truth is we are working to get you time' I instantly felt my heart clench, the tears came and the panic of everything began to consume my whole being. I tried my best to take notes, to listen and to ask 'helpful' question. But it just looks so bleak. We have known that we only get time. How much no one can really say, but we know about a year. When you look into your life and plan