Day Fifty-Six

 Today radiation changed, they are now doing a more intensive round of radiation focusing on the pockets of tumor that have the most active growing cells. I have found that few people understand radiation many thought it was injections or a chemical tablet or liquid medicine... These are all wrong. So to clear it up radiation treatment is basically like a microwave only more localized and instead of doing everything it beams into the specific areas of his brain 'tenderizing' the tumor and cancer cells so that the chemotherapy is more effective. With this happening I don't know if his side effects will be worse or the same, today it feels the same, he did say he couldn't smell it like he had before whether or not that is a fluke only time will tell. 

I feel more and more grateful my sister is here every day. I frequently feel like I cannot do this or that and the stress of my feelings of failure feel unsurmountable, yet each day my sister Amy just anticipates my needs and does things. I don't know that she even fully understands how grateful I am! From doing dishes and laundry to building forts with my kids and taking them on treasure hunts or reading to them at bedtime. She is saving me and I may never let her leave me. Selfish much😬?

Eight more treatments. I am so looking forward to being done with radiation. We both are, and at the same time I feel grateful that radiation is an option and hopefully it is doing its job and giving us an opportunity to enjoy life and make some amazing memories. Ryan is amazing and fighting for us all.